The trashiest meal J and I ever ate
So one night we get a call from Blonde Amazon #2. Blonde Amazon #2 is amazing. She a SoCal refugee like me and she’s 6’2” tall and smart, loud, and brash. And, dude, she’s hot. Like crazy ass smoking hot. Like heads turn and we get free pitchers of margarita’s hot. Anyway, Blonde Amazon #2 calls us to see if we would want to hang at one of the Capitol Hill watering holes. It appears that DC men perplex her. A cute guy on the metro stares her up and down and somehow can’t close the deal and approach her. This seems to happen to Blonde Amazon #2 a lot. Of course we have to break it to her that there’s a perception that single women in DC outnumber single men in DC. This leads to many a single man to feel entitled to be an emotional fuckwit.
Of course, you cannot break said news to your recently arrive SoCal friend over sushi and a salad. Over the top trashy food needs to be ingested. Therefore we head to the Capitol Lounge for beers (or hard cider in my case) and bar food. Lucky for us it’s 25 cent taco nite. That’s cheaper than Taco Bell! We order 12. The Capitol Lounge is a little stingy with the meat in their tacos but for 25 cents, I ain’t complaining. Tacos alone cannot untangle the complexities of the DC dating scene. Cheese fries are called in as reinforcements. Cheddar cheese? Not on my watch. Processed cheese sludge on very crisp fries. Finally, as if our arteries weren’t hardening enough, we decided to get a plat of the wings. Can you believe this was out MEAL? With the exception of the celery sticks served alongside the wings, nary a hint of fiber to be found.